As the MANDARIN, Dominic Cummings is VANQUISHED..
..Competing sorcerer, THE GREAT SAJID (trademark, Marvel comics) ascends to power! HE will now probably be the CHIEF OF STAFFF! THEN? THE WORLD! THE UNIVERSE IS HIS!
In a move set to stun the broadsheets, tabloids and pointless 24 hour fake news cycle..Boris Johnson (AKA ‘THE UK PRIME MINISTER’ so legend has it?) has EXILED powerful sorcerer, DOMINIC ‘The Mekon’ Cummings.
It is thought that a man in a chicken costume was approached to work with Cummings. But neither of those men could withstand the deeper magic of THE GREAT SAJID!
Carrie Symonds and Sienna Miller have been instrumental in advising on these new developments. They were alarmed to learn that Cummings had bought a functioning, tactical, thermonuclear weapon on the black market. During LOCKDOWN! He had to go!
Marvel Comics and Movies are very pleased with this news. If successful? It is thought that a whole franchise could develop. A shared universe of bald advisors to the PM?
Watch this space!