15 April 2021 700 Views

INDIANA JONES AND THE FATAL LACK OF IMAGINATION IN THE CASTING DEPARTMENT

by James Murphy

INDY 5 ADDS MADS. Fine! Great! He is a fine actor, decent chap and brings shared franchise credentials. That being said? GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR…IS THIS MOVIE BEING CAST BY ALGORITHM? 

 

Rule number 1 of sequels. Same as war. SURPRISE. Give the people what they want, not what they think they might want. Those who you speculate about getting a role are frequently far too easy and obvious a choice. Hence, I continue losing any interest in Indiana Jones 5. Coz in addition to Waller-Bridging it they just cast Mr ‘Hi I am a bad guy’ as the probable ..bad guy.

Yes, MADS MIKKELSEN has been cast as the probable antagonist in Dr. Jones’ probably final adventure on film. 

COULD be playing a goodie, right? Sure. ROGUE ONE is just one exception where Mads played nice. But that kinda proves the rule. MADS = BAD AND DANGEROUS. It’s a move sure to give Cumberbatch delusions of grandeur (hey! Dr Strange fought an Indiana Jones baddie..I am the new Harrison Ford?..I jest, but..we see you, Benedict..).

And it has Daniel Craig written all over it. Seriously, he has influence. Craig and Ford are mates; Craig put Waller Bridge on 007 script duties. And Mads recently filmed a retrospective with Craig for Casino Royale.. in which the baddie (Le Chiffre) was played by…etc.

Go figure. Obviously: Mr Mikkelsen will indeed be whipping Indy’s balls. Figuratively. And possibly literally, given the lack of originality on display here. 

I hope I am wrong. Hope Mads is some junior academic whom Jones must rescue (precedent: Mikkelsen once played a falsely accused teacher and was sublime). But likelihood is he plays some neo-nazi out for revenge or an eeeevil archaeologist in a pact with Satan or something. He is the template ‘champagne villain’ no doubt, of mixed and therefore un-offend-able ethnicity but foreign and therefore dodgy in a not at all racist way for the WOKE generation.

OTHER.ACTORS.ARE.AVAILABLE! And, whilst I will not provide QUITE the epic list I made for alternative Waller-Bridges, I can, off top of head, cite a number of equal and opposite bad guy power wielders who would have provided a worthy challenge AND somehow SURPRISED us in the casting department. 

Non exhaustive.  Varied ethnicity / age  / physique /class/ presence.

  • Some have played villains and are arguably therefore as obvious as Mads. Yet they remain just that bit more daring a choice imho.
  • Some have not been baddies, ever. But could /should be. 
  • Others are rich/famous/expensive /possibly might challenge Ford for top billing? Occasional examples faced Harrison be-ford in other films.
  • And hey, some may even still turn up IN the final film but just have not been announced yet.
  • All/any would be as good as Mads and probably more of a novelty. 

No order as such..here we go:

 

  • One of the OTHER Mikkelsens: HE HAS BROTHERS! 🙂 Failing which..

 

  • Alun Armstrong; Michael Kitchen; Pierce Brosnan; Gary Oldman; Hugh Grant; Tommy Lee Jones; Liam Neeson; Tom Selleck; Kevin Costner; Mel Gibson; Sean Penn; Christian Bale; Hugh Jackman; Matt Smith; Claes Bang;

 

  • Bill Nighy; Colin Firth; John Shea; Bryan Cranston; Matthew Macfadyen; Richard E Grant; Brendan Gleeson; Mark Rylance;  Richard McCabe; Bradley Cooper; Paul Bettany; Eric Bana; Ben Daniels; Ian Hart; David Thewlis;

 

  • Jeremy Irons; Ian Bartholomew; Nigel Havers; Robert Lindsay; Liam Cunningham; Joseph Fiennes; Ed Harris; Benicio Del Toro; Rob Lowe; Viggo Mortensen; Stuart Wilson; James Spader; Gérard Depardieu; Russell Crowe; Iain Glen; Richard Gere;  Sam Neill;  Josh Lucas; 

 

  • Ben Kingsley; Kevin Kline; John Goodman; David Strathairn;  Patrick Wilson; Damian Lewis; Jared Harris; James Norton; John Travolta; Josh Brolin; Steve Carell; Samuel L Jackson; Billy Bob Thornton; Peter Stormare; Kelsey Grammer; Gabriel Byrne; Jason Clarke; Guy Pearce; Joaquin Phoenix; Alec Baldwin; Arliss Howard; Hugo Weaving; Rhys Ifans; Bill Murray; Matt Dillon; Wendell Pierce; Michael Kelly; Vincent D’Onofrio; Stephen Graham; Jon Hamm; Michael Douglas; William Hurt..

 

So yes. OTHER BADDIE ACTORS WERE AROUND/AVAILABLE. But hey, Madds a fast, easy choice. Comes with franchise goodwill, fangirl clout and though a ‘name’ is not so big he will cost too much $$ or risk upstaging Harrison Ford. Clever and yet also, incredibly, as Le Chiffre might say ‘so so dull..so so wrong’. That said? I take it all back if he says ‘YOU ARE A FUNNNNNY MAN, DR JONES’..and laughs, menacingly, to camera and a John Williams theme.

 

INDIANA JONES AND THE MONKEY KING’S NUTS is in rapid pre-production for a 2022 release, God (s) willing. Best of luck! 

 



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