31 January 2022 628 Views

Watch out, Putin! THE IRISH are coming!

by James Murphy

You could not make it up.

Which is why it would make a great movie..

Based on a true story. Here is the pitch. ish. At a glance..

2022. It is a time of great unrest in the world. Russia stands on the brink of maybe invading Ukraine. And their ships and subs are therefore more active.

They made a BIG mistake going into Irish waters..or rather, waters which Irish fishermen enjoy access to, necessarily, for basic survival.

Initially, Vlad and co issue a warning. ‘No fishing here. We conduct za operational exercises. It would be shame for you to get caught in ze fire’ (not quite; i paraphrase via artistic licence but you get the idea).

Irish fishermen: Nah. We will not be told where to fish, thanks!

So, these Irish guys go and seek out the RUSSIAN AMBASSADOR! Tea at the consulate ensues. Russians get on the phones to their Bosses. They respect, totally, the position outlined and the work ethic personified.

Cue a result which sees Mother Russia retract its warnings. Normal fishing resumes!

 

 

Now: if that is NOT a movie pitch, in waiting? I dunno what is?! It is funny, current, David and Goliath stuff.

You’d  need a bit of filler. Archive footage ofthe Ukraine build up? Irish and Russian bureaucrats back and forth. A few high seas fishing action scenes. But in general, think light hearted, warm, romantic, comedic FUN. Say 70-90 mins, duration, max?

Think Neil Jordan directing!

And a cast of who’s who of Irish theatrical and cinematic royalty.

Liam Neeson!  Every Gleeson (senior and junior?!) Pierce Brosnan! Colm Meaney! Dylan Moran! Jean Butler! Michael Gambon! Jonathan Rhys Meyers! Aidan Turner! Michael Fassbender! Alison Doody! Caitriona Balfe!

tone? FULL MONTY + ROCKY + PERFECT STORM + HUNT FOR RED OCTOBER via CALENDAR GIRLS / LE MANS 66

Go on, Hollywood…i will pitch and write it. Starting here, now…

 



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